Thursday, June 26, 2008

Day by day

is definitely the way I am taking this pregnancy. I think back to how in the pregnancy with Mira I called Ruth my pregnant daughter every time I saw her. I asked her if that was alright with her and she just smiled and expressed pleasure with the earned label. This time I'm less open, less playful, and I hope that doesn't take away from the joy of this pregnancy. I am eager to hold Sprout in my arms, hopeful, excited - but keeping my emotions down, biding my time. Truth is that's no protection from grieving a loss though, every loss is a loss. I'm letting myself attach more and more to the idea of Sprout.


SarahSews said...

Nothing will take away from the joy once you all feel more secure. And the joy when Sprout arrives on time won't be affected by the anxiety you feel today. I swear.

Ruth said...

I feel the same way you do mom. Of course Sarah is right that the current anxiety won't touch the joy should Sprout make it here healthy. My concern is more about now--I don't want to let the fear get in the way of celebrating what I have now (or to let myself get ahead and start celebrating the baby I hope I will have)... I'm doing a pretty good job of celebrating each day for what it is without thinking too much about tomorrow. I'm glad we can share that. (Speaking of what is--I'm 8 weeks today!)

SeaStar said...

Sarah, I'm about to go to your blog and see if your long awaited little one is here yet. And thank you again for writing here and adding your perspective and warmth. Ruth, I do think you are doing a great job of celebrating each day without assuming an outcome one way or another. I'm also glad we can share our concerns. And happy eight weeks, pregnant daughter.