Monday, June 2, 2008

odd (good odd)

Its so odd that Ruth is pregnant again. I'm saying the words in the same sentence again - Ruth and pregnant. It scares me. I don't believe in jinxes or that we can control outcomes one way or another. It still scares me. I am reserving my emotions, its so early, but there is definitely hope.

Today Ruth took me with her to try on a bridesmaid's dress she will be wearing in late October and she folded a scarf into the belly area to simulate a five month bump. I felt sad thinking she'd be bigger than that with Mira now - and also hopeful. She looked lovely in her golden mermaid dress, and will, pregnant or not.

And I hope she will still be pregnant. I hope. I hope.

4 comments:

Ruth said...

Mama,

I'd forgotten about this blog until today! (I didn't have it favorite placed).

I'm touched you are still blogging here.

There's nothing more to say. I'm hoping too (but then you know that). Thank you for being exactly who you are (and for sharing her so wonderfulyl with me).

I love you

SeaStar said...

Love you too Ru. I expect to be sharing on this blog a lot through this journey of hope and doubt - but hope - mostly hope. Thank you for being exactly who you are too.

SarahSews said...

Hoping for all of you that this means great things. Those first days are so scary and I know that when I told my mom we were pg again after a very recent loss, she didn't want to know. She was so scared. But this time was different and the boy will be here any day.

Keeping hoping and loving.

SeaStar said...

How exciting to you Sararah that your boy will be here any day. Delightful, encouraging marvelous news - feeds the rest of us, waiting and hoping.